Baby Shower Invitations Etiquette

When the invitation does not specify whether or not to bring children to a baby shower, consider the age and maturity of each child.

Inviting kids to a baby shower is the hostess’s individual choice. If she is not specific in the invitation, consider the formality of the event and the age of the child. Then, double check with her before bringing the kids.

Is the Shower Formal or Informal?

The invitation and location of the party are good indicators. If the shower invitation is a simple generic card (or an electronic invite) and the party is to take place in an informal setting (a home or small event hall), the baby shower is most likely informal. If, however, the invitations are higher end and the shower is located at an up-scale event hall, it is probably a more formal shower.
A warm, informal shower will be more comfortable for small children. A formal shower will most likely be uncomfortable for them.

How Old Is Each Child?

Certain children will be more able to attend the baby shower. Newborns and teens may be easier to bring than toddlers and young children.

• Newborns. Newborn babies are generally welcome at most showers, particularly baby showers. This includes babies up to four or five months old. Let common sense determine whether or not to bring a baby over the age of five months. A mother with an active baby will have a hard time participating in the festivities.
• Toddlers to Tweens. Children from one to ten may have a hard time sitting through a shower. Unless the host suggests otherwise, do not plan to bring children of this age. When hiring a sitter is not an option, feel free to use this as an excuse to decline the invitation. Perhaps the hostess will extend an invitation to the children. She may even have options for keeping them entertained during the party.
• Preteens and Teens. Children ten and older may be able to attend, depending on the individual child’s maturity level. A mature teen may enjoy participating in the baby shower games, while an active preteen may find it too boring.

When in doubt, always check with the hostess of the party about bringing children. Be sensitive, allowing her the option to decline without the fear of hurt feelings. Say, for example, “I have options for a sitter, but I wanted to check and see if I am supposed to bring the children.” It is easy to become offended if children are excluded from the party, but try to remember her focus is on the guest of honor and the other guests.